My guest blogger today is The Big E – grade 4. We hope you enjoy his tale of suspense and intrigue.
It was Christmas Eve in Glueville and the Affengrincher was coming so that night the Affengrincher got on his hovercraft with barking missiles and headed off to Glueville. When he got to the gate he saw that it was locked so he fired one of his barking missiles at the gate and the gate got so scared from all the barking that it ran away.
So the Affengrincher went into the village and picked the first house. Once he was inside he took all the presents and went to the next house. This time he saw that it was a live tree not a fake tree so he took the ribbon off a present and put part of it in the fireplace then set the tree on fire with the ribbon.
At the next house once he took the presents a kid came up to him and said “Are you Santa?” That night the Affengrincher’s teeth grew 3 sizes and he bit the kid’s arm off.
To which his teacher responded, “Very touching.” I can assure you that The Big E is a lovely child, not at all prone to malicious fire-starting or cannibalism.